Yoshi "Nanashi" Nanase (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
justonezero) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
netslum2023-10-17 04:40 pm
justonezero) wrote in netslum2023-10-17 04:40 pm
Talking to Lily Last Week (un: Nanashi)
i was wrong. i really did talk to lily last week. or dv, or cubia, or whatever the name of that voice is.
when i said people should be able to return to reality, he said it was illogical to think people would be able to find happiness through others outside. and that it doesn't make sense for me to have hope for the world even though people outside hate me
he also decided that he likes me, so he decided to keep me. and since i called myself garbage, he said he'd fix me, but i'm so broken he wondered if it was better to break me down and make something new... i don't really know what he meant by those.
before he stopped talking, he told me he was giving me a gift so i could know what true happiness is. i think that's why i forgot how much people in reality hate me. ...i think he wanted to show how much happier i'd be if i stayed in the game and forgot about the outside world. but now that i remember it all, i don't want to stay here. so i guess that didn't work.
did anyone else who talked to him lose something too? and has it come back yet?
when i said people should be able to return to reality, he said it was illogical to think people would be able to find happiness through others outside. and that it doesn't make sense for me to have hope for the world even though people outside hate me
he also decided that he likes me, so he decided to keep me. and since i called myself garbage, he said he'd fix me, but i'm so broken he wondered if it was better to break me down and make something new... i don't really know what he meant by those.
before he stopped talking, he told me he was giving me a gift so i could know what true happiness is. i think that's why i forgot how much people in reality hate me. ...i think he wanted to show how much happier i'd be if i stayed in the game and forgot about the outside world. but now that i remember it all, i don't want to stay here. so i guess that didn't work.
did anyone else who talked to him lose something too? and has it come back yet?
un: fandaniel
[ Fandaniel doesn't know Nanashi well apart from an idle glance back during the CC Corp meeting. A latecomer to the test? Likely, but that means there is no entrenched disdain for this one. ]
So you were displeased with the outcome of his gift?
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and yeah... even if he was trying to get rid of all my bad memories, there are still good things that happened in them. i don't want to lose those.
if you lost your memories of everything bad that happened to you, would you be happier?
and if you knew the alternative, would you decide to get rid of them for good?
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What I would do matters little. Do not mind that.
But you wish to keep the bad memories for the silver linings they contain. To leave here, to go back to a world that treats you poorly. What do you hope for then, once you do? What future do you see ahead of yourself, Nanashi?
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i told lily that for everyone, there's someone out there who can show them happiness in reality. and if there's somebody like that even for someone like me, i'm even more sure there's somebody like that for everybody else, too.
you matter because lily told me there are people here who don't want to go on living. people who are so miserable irl that the game is the only thing that gives them peace.
are you happier in the game?
what kind of future would you like to see?
what makes the world worth going back to for you?
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There is not somebody for everybody out there.
What makes the world out there worth it for you does not exist for all.
That is a childish notion at best, though not an unkind one. Here, however, here there can be. There is no distance, no borders or oceans, no laws or expectations keeping us all apart. There is no harsh reality weighing down on you.
I see a future where this world is ours to mold, to create, and to enjoy as we see fit.
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there's billions of people in the world. there must be at least one person. they just haven't found you yet.
and i mean, i'm about as trash as you can get, and i've still made friends here.
so now i want to find them irl too!
have you made any friends here?
can you meet them outside?
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I wish they would stay here with me instead but that is not for me to decide, only them.
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I mean that I plan on staying in this place.
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is that right?
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I loathe the thought of seeing them return to such a terrible place.
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i'll talk to you again later, then!
not here
un: UTA
...
Not everyone will be so lucky to return to reality even if they wish to.
However, I do hope that you are able to find the person that you are looking for in the real world.
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but, if you did have the choice, which one do you think you would choose?
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I'd be lying if I didn't say that only existing within the Fragment as I am hasn't influenced the way I see things.
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